Young Again

These pills will cure everything associated with getting old - say goodbye to wrinkles, age spots, sagging, drooping, snoring and memory loss. Make ear hair, nose hair and no hair a thing of the past! Forget about pesky aches and pains, swollen joints, hearing loss and bad vision. You'll stay young forever! Just take these miracle pills everyday. If after 25 years they haven't worked, please return them for your money back.

Dr. Gerry Attricks, Arthur Itis Laboratories, Older, Colorado